Earlier in the week, a patron approached the reference desk and asked about getting Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs. I assured the lady that the children's book was very popular at the moment but I would be happy to put her on hold for a copy.
Lady: Oh I don't want the book, I'm looking for the movie.
Me (confused): The movie?
Lady: Yes, the 3-D cartoon movie.
Me: The movie that out in the theaters right now? Oh we won't have a copy of that for awhile, at least not until it comes out on dvd.
Lady: Could you check?
Me: Well, I know we don't own-
Lady (annoyed): Just look it up, ok? How will you know if you don't even look?
Me (double checking): Yup, I'm afraid we don't own it yet, but if you check back in a couple of months-
Lady: Put me on hold for it.
Me: I'm afraid I can't put a hold on an item unless there is a record for the item. Maybe as it gets closer to the dvd release date-
Lady (giant unnecessary eye-roll): Listen, I don't want an explanation, I want you to just put me on hold for it.
Me: Ma'am, I'd be happy to put you on hold for it, but I'm trying to tell you-
Lady: Sweetie, either you can put it on hold for me or you can get your manager.
Since the branch manager was currently in a meeting and I did not want to pull her out for such ridiculousness, I decided that the only way to end her childish behavior was to get caught in playing her game. With a few nonsense keystrokes I nodded at the lady and told her that I put her on hold for the brand new movie we did not own. She walked away satisfied in the transaction, despite the fact that she never handed me her card. I know I'll probably regret it at a later date when she discovers I deceived her, but luckily crazy has a way of outing itself so I'm hoping whoever she complains to will be on my side.